HAPPY BIRTHDAY NARESH .....

well today was the day..around 23 years ago tht this guy naresh was born.......on his birthday here i try to pay a tribute to him and our friendship.....hope u got the hint tht today is his b'day and iam gonna praise him to the core.....hehe...

frankly speaking i just need a occasion to praise him.....wht better one than his birthday.........

i remember our first meetin..it was in year 1998....here was a guy..with a tilak in his fore head...and he used utter "jesus" for any profanity in the boys lingo...i thought " wht a queer guy"...looks like a lost one....

and in a few days we were like pullin each others leg very often....so much so tht people thought we had some sort of " rayalseema rivalry" between us...but soon we developed a sort of bondin ..quite unconsciously...........we discovered tht we had matchin tastes in most of things which could keep us together like movies, studies..and contrastingly different tastes in things tht cud separate us...like girls...( we liked exactly opposite kind of gals..hehe)......

and we were fortunate enough to be in same class even in engg..and our friendship blossomed more and more.....of course stayin with him resulted in me being popular atleast as " tht guy who roams around with naresh"......

this guy with his tall dark and handsome looks.... had a large legion of fans among gals..so much so that he did not even realise it....

and i frankly thought that he would never fall in love...i mean with kind of gal he had in mind as his "dream gal"...i thought such gals cud be developed as special effect in computers.....but luckily for him..he was in love and happy...hope he stays that way.......

i have always wondered how cud a guy be so very gud so very perfect ..with out any blemishes, faults...or shortcomings..he always amazed me to that extent......no well meaning person could get angry with him......always helpful, always doin the right thing....

looks like this is gettin longer...but iam never short of words when praisin this fella.....

the best gift i cud give him for his birthday is HE himself...cos there is no better thing in this world than him.......

since he already has it..the next best thing i could do is tell him that HE is the best.....

Happy birthday naresh...may u have all that u desire and all tht u aspire....

lemme have ur friendship......

the beach.............

why dont we have a beach in delhi... i miss it so much..............

the best thing about the beach it is free....hehe....it was one place u could hang out without burnin a hole in ur pockets...............

U cud feel the solitude ...inspite of all the crowds..u can sit and watch the waves....it is as if..it is u and the waves.......there was something about those waves which made me a touch philosophical...makin me to zoom into one of those retrospective moods......playin with the waves was another fun activity..................

ofcourse me and my friend always used to lament that we could not hang out with gal friends in the beach....well he has moved on in his life ...and as for me it has remained an unfulfilled wish.... no probs..... it is a long life.....

ofcourse u had those groundnuts and muri mixtures...and other sea delicacies to go with it...................

well my friends if you ever get into a place on the coastline dont ever miss THE BEACH...............

Happy......

hey this song from the film happy is quite infectious......quite a peppy tune.....well today my mood quite reflects it......

hmm........ i did not do anything big or worthwhile today to explain it......watched 3 movies today...along with cricket telecast.........time pass stuff...but definitely not a worthwhile pastime....

why am i happy???????????.....cant explain it...so many little things.....combine to make me happy.....a feel good mood...........as i goto bed a HAPPY man.......

Missin Gitam..............

Iam missin gitam………very much……… iam missin all my frenzzz….especially the days spent at gitam……even if
i meet all my frenz can we relive those days………iam missin the times spent on the
stairs of library, in the canteen , in sairam parlour, those cricket
matches in the ground….those parties at our canteens and foodex…..i
miss them all ……… the walks we used to take in between studying……..the
bus rides…..the 8 o clockbus……e learning centre…those long chats..after bunkin classes...movies with friends....…….i miss them all……I miss
the people……… …I have moved into an busy life……….i have lots to do…I
enjoy myself here….this place has its own maza but I miss gitam…….i
feel like cryin when iam writin this…..i feel like goin back 2 those
days……..but u know we cant …time moves….i don't know if I will meet all my friends ever again in life………..even if I meet them will it again be the
same………….i don't know…….

Lazigar.......

This is cool..life has become such a free bizz...nothin much to..nothin really to slog...but this is real dangerous...iam getting used to this sort of lazing around....

and iam becoming very lazy..once u get used to be vetti ..or vela...as they call it..it is real difficult to come out of that thing...inertia of rest ......as it can be called ...is very difficult to overcome...

hope i dont get enslaved to it.....

well on one side iam longin for something exciting to do...whereas on the other side..iam really lazy to go and search for it.....wht a paradox......

I have become a LAZIGAAR....:D

Rang De Basanti......

well a nice movie after a real long time..a movie which made me laugh , think, feel and fret all at the same time............

thankfully this movie did not preach, it wanted to put a message across.......which it does effectively....

but wht do we do with the message....everyone as long as they see the movie, they seem to agree with it...but everyone goes home and forgets it..life goes as usual............

then is there no solution for all this????....will things remain the same and go even bad.........

well only solution is from the common man..the common man which is me...which is you..which is everyone...no one can do anything big...no one can actually do it..no one needs to..it is the small things which we should start.....a small step which would be the beginning of a long journey...

but who is putting the first step across??????who is starting it all????????????

Positivism???

Well here I am a great believer of positivism...question it...doubtin it...sounds strange.....

but i had had this nagging doubt..here iam takin pleasure in small joys....small signs of encouragement, small rays of hope............but does this really work....

When reality stares me in the face...can i take it...can i accept it......Is this positivism a miracle drug??..or a narcotic which is gettin onto my veins..which will leave me in despair..the day it is snatched away from me???????

Only time will answer...................

MY DOUBT?????

Well i have had this doubt...what is there to be excited about a marriage...well to be more specific arranged marriages.....well guys ...they r a species which seems to be excited about anything remotely female..leave them...wht about the gals????..

i mean i have seen gals gettin so very paranoidically excited about getting married... u see there is this guy whom they did not know tht he existed on this planet about some time ago...and now they are hopping excitedly about getting married to them...and in most of the cases ..we do not have any handsome greek god waiting out there...to give a plausible explanation for my doubt............but mostly its a pot bellied doctor( aNRI who has made money in dollars) or a balding software geek.......

whts there to get excited....u people are gonna get married and lose whatever freedom u had..take on new burdens, new responsibilities....and new troubles..u have a mother-in - law waiting for u.........

WHT THE #%^@$ IS THERE TO GET EXCITED ABOUT???????

Train Journey......

Well then i had a 36 hour train journey...............and to top it all i was in a mood when solitude seemed like a boon......combined with co passengers who seemed to be discussing the most mundane topics i could ever fathom.......

so here i was thinking and thinking of things ranging from sports to relations, space to microbial...and as ofcourse i was bored in no time....well with so much thought process flowing all i wanted was a computer with a net connection so that i would blog away to glory...hehe and tht was out of question.............

well i cant even remember most of those things now......but tht ordeal of spending 36 hours of a train journey .....well tht does not seem to be the last one.....i have many more journeys to make.........

let me start puttin my thoughts as they come to me..in the next few posts..........

Whts happening??????

Life has been a breeze ......nothin much to do..nothin much to achieve,...time seems to be standing still.....

2006 has just began..a new year , new hopes , new aspirations.............everything new....but nothin seems to have changed...................

Last few days have seen my mood wander into extremes.....what all can have when u have time to think...mind is very fast ..it keeps taking you into different realms, different possibilities, different aspects, different moods, so much so that u begin to live there, firmly entrenched there..............

this post may seem to be in random, thts how it has been............random thoughts, random ideas, random possibilities..thts been life......

let me put last few days in perspective..........it was all wonderful at home..doting parents...friends to have fun with....places i loved...food i relished..etcetc.....then I started for delhi...back to college....to finish off my final sem...determined to have the final dose of fun..before i get onto the altar of job...sloggin away to be in the rat race........................

well rest in next post.............................

New Year.....

Aah the new year has arrived….well the celebrations and all the hullabaloo has happened as usual….people sending their wishes ..clogged mobile networks, cards, greetings and all the reviews of movies, news, sports have all happened. Now life gets back to usual and back to work on a Monday morning.

Now just wait and retrospect on the year that’s gone by. On a personal front another tumultuous year has passed by. What a wide range of emotions have I gone through? From the despairs of February to festivities of December what a journey it has been. Well I would classify this year as a good one for as they say “ alls well that ends well”. Well this a very good time for me and it would quite justify the rating.

But more than that I will put this down as a landmark year for the lessons it has taught me. I definitely finish this year as a much better and mature person than what I was when it began. I have learnt to take life as it comes. I have stopped expecting things to happen. I have learnt to place myself into the shoes of other person and think from their position. Though I have not perfected this I have made an attempt and this has given me quite a good deal of better results when dealing with people.

What else will I remember this year for??? I can remember this for a lot of small joys which have come through, which on the whole may not make a sense for their significance in life. But on their own they form a special place. Little joys, little gestures, little delights especially which happen when least expected which can leave you exhilarated.

I can also remember this year for some of the knocks which I have taken. Times when I was very disturbed, when I was confused, when I had no idea what I had to. Though these are times which I would like to forget in retrospective, but I don’t want to lose the lesson which was hidden at those moments, the lesson to look at things positively. On retrospective we often realize how most disasters are self made. How just a different line of thinking could have changed the whole scenario? I would like to take the lesson to look at things from the positive perspective.

I am not fully into the mode of positive thinking but definitely I have come a long way. And this has made a significant difference in my life. I am a much more happier person now. And I have also come firmly to believe that god has his own way of doing things. Another offshoot of positive thinking. I have realized there is no use complaining. Expecting life to be fair to you is like expecting a ravaging bull to spare you because you are a vegetarian. So just accept things as they come, it would make sense in the retrospective.

As for people as usual many people come in and go out of your life with every passing year. But some do stay, they do stay in your conscience whatever happens. It is for them that we struggle. But time and tide waits for none. People move away in the flow of time. Different lives take different turns. Every one has his own road to follow. Roads which will part as they go. If two people have to stay together it has to be on the same road which wont happen without competition and clash, which again does not help the cause of companionship. So I have learnt to accept this fact of life. As people get busy with their own lives, aspirations and dreams, old friends do take a backseat. But u really can’t complain. Life is like that. And u got to accept this harsh reality and life has to go on. Even we our self may be guilty of doing so with out we realizing it. So u got to learn to live with it.

But some things do stay stuck. You wish some things to stay forever. You want some things to happen. You know the possibilities are very less. You know the odds are stacked up against it. But still some where, appears a beacon of hope, even though it is hopeless. This endeavor to hope for something impossible has perhaps defined spirit of mankind. This is perhaps what has brought humanity to this juncture. This struggle between practicality and wishful thinking is what defines our lives. Where we shall draw a line is something that will determine our state of mind.

So that is my new year resolution take life as it comes. Enjoy every moment of life. Plan your life as it happens. But if there is still something that defines your happiness, go for it. However impossible it may seem, however unthinkable it may be. Life’s beauty is in that struggle. Enjoyment is in the journey, destination is just the culmination.

So I continue to search for the end to my search for The Beginning.